"Speak when you are angry - and you'll make the best speech you'll ever regret."
-Laurence J. Peter
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"An intelligence test sometimes shows a man how smart he would have been not to have taken it."
-Laurence J. Peter
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"Early to bed, early to rise, work like hell, and advertise."
-Laurence J. Peter
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"You can always tell a real friend: when you've made a fool of yourself he doesn't feel you've done a permanent job."
-Laurence J. Peter
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"An economist is an expert who will know tomorrow why the things he predicted yesterday didn't happen today."
-Laurence J. Peter
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"Work is accomplished by those employees who have not yet reached their level of incompetence."
-Laurence J. Peter
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"A day without sunshine is like, you know, night."
-Steve Martin
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"When you are courting a nice girl an hour seems like a second. When you sit on a red-hot cinder a second seems like an hour. That's relativity."
-Albert Einstein
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"People say that life is the thing, but I prefer reading."
-Logan P. Smith
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"My one regret in life is that I am not someone else."
-Woody Allen
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"To succeed in life, you need three things: a wishbone, a backbone and a funny bone."
-Reba McEntire
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"My grandmother started walking five miles a day when she was sixty. She's ninety-seven now, and we don't know where the hell she is."
-Ellen DeGeneres
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