"For three days after death, hair and fingernails continue to grow but phone calls taper off."
-Johnny Carson
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"If it weren't for Philo T. Farnsworth, inventor of television, we'd still be eating frozen radio dinners.“
-Johnny Carson
posted in Funny
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"I know a man who gave up smoking, drinking, sex, and rich food. He was healthy right up to the day he killed himself."
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"My success just evolved from working hard at the business at hand each day."
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"Mail your packages early so the post office can lose them in time for Christmas."
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"Never continue in a job you don't enjoy. If you're happy in what you're doing, you'll like yourself, you'll have inner peace. And if you have that, along with physical health, you will have had more success than you could possibly have imagined."
-Johnny Carson
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"For days after death hair and fingernails continue to grow, but phone calls taper off."
-Johnny Carson
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