"The length of a film should be directly related to the endurance of the human bladder."
-Alfred Hitchcock
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"In feature films the director is God in documentary films God is the director.“
-Alfred Hitchcock
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Other Quotes by Alfred Hitchcock
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"Luck is everything... My good luck in life was to be a really frightened person. I'm fortunate to be a coward, to have a low threshold of fear, because a hero couldn't make a good suspense film."
-Alfred Hitchcock
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"We seem to have a compulsion these days to bury time capsules in order to give those people living in the next century or so some idea of what we are like."
-Alfred Hitchcock
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"A lot of movies are about life, mine are like a slice of cake."
-Alfred Hitchcock
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"A good film is when the price of the dinner, the theatre admission and the babysitter were worth it."
-Alfred Hitchcock
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"Television has brought back murder into the home - where it belongs."
-Alfred Hitchcock
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"Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, today is God's gift, that's why we call it the present."
-Joan Rivers
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"All God does is watch us and kill us when we get boring. We must never, ever be boring."
-Chuck Palahniuk
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"If you want to make God laugh, tell him about your plans."
-Woody Allen
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"Part of me suspects that I'm a loser, and the other part of me thinks I'm God Almighty."
-John Lennon
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"To you I'm an atheist to God, I'm the Loyal Opposition."
-Woody Allen
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"I have never made but one prayer to God, a very short one: 'O Lord make my enemies ridiculous.' And God granted it."
-Voltaire
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