"I'm selfish, impatient, and a little insecure. I make mistakes, I'm out of control, and at times hard to handle. But if you can't handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best."
-Marilyn Monroe
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"The thing about For Better or Worse is the only thing that made me an okay director for that is that I have a sense of humor, and it was supposed to be funny.“
-Jason Alexander
posted in Humor
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"In three words I can sum up everything I've learned about life: it goes on."
-Robert Frost
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"Don't walk in front of me, I may not follow. Don't walk behind me, I may not lead. There is only one happiness in life, to love and be loved."
-George Sand
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"If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything."
-Mark Twain
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"I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel."
-Maya Angelou
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"Always forgive your enemies - nothing annoys them so much."
-Oscar Wilde
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"A joke is a very serious thing."
-Winston Churchill
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"Humor is reason gone mad."
-Groucho Marx
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"There is a thin line that separates laughter and pain, comedy and tragedy, humor and hurt."
-Erma Bombeck
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"Humor is mankind's greatest blessing."
-Mark Twain
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"The secret to humor is surprise."
-Aristotle
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"Humor is laughing at what you haven't got when you ought to have it."
-Langston Hughes
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