"The problem with winter sports is that - follow me closely here - they generally take place in winter."
-Dave Barry
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"Guys are simple... women are not simple and they always assume that men must be just as complicated as they are, only way more mysterious. The whole point is guys are not thinking much. They are just what they appear to be. Tragically.“
-Dave Barry
posted in Women
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"The leading cause of death among fashion models is falling through street grates."
-Dave Barry
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"Camping is nature's way of promoting the motel business."
-Dave Barry
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"Eating rice cakes is like chewing on a foam coffee cup, only less filling."
-Dave Barry
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"Hobbies of any kind are boring except to people who have the same hobby. This is also true of religion, although you will not find me saying so in print."
-Dave Barry
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"What I look forward to is continued immaturity followed by death."
-Dave Barry
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"All the world's a stage, and all the men and women merely players: they have their exits and their entrances and one man in his time plays many parts, his acts being seven ages."
-William Shakespeare
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"Wherever men and women are persecuted because of their race, religion, or political views, that place must - at that moment - become the center of the universe."
-Elie Wiesel
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"Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea."
-Robert A. Heinlein
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"A study in the Washington Post says that women have better verbal skills than men. I just want to say to the authors of that study: 'Duh.'"
-Conan O'Brien
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"Between men and women there is no friendship possible. There is passion, enmity, worship, love, but no friendship."
-Oscar Wilde
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"Women speak because they wish to speak, whereas a man speaks only when driven to speak by something outside himself like, for instance, he can't find any clean socks."
-Jean Kerr
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