"Humor can be an incredible lacerating and effective weapon. And that is the way I use it."
-Carl Hiaasen
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"My books are shelved in different places, depending on the bookstore. Sometimes they can be found in the Mystery section, sometimes in the Humor department, and occasionally even in the Literature aisle, which is somewhat astounding."
-Carl Hiaasen
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"One problem with age is that patience begins to ebb."
-Carl Hiaasen
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"Nobody with an IQ higher than emergency-room temperature could ever believe that 'death panels' would be appointed to nudge the elderly toward euthanasia. Yet for idle entertainment, it's hard to beat Sarah Palin's ignorant nattering on the subject."
-Carl Hiaasen
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"I never laugh or smile when I am writing. When I come home for lunch after writing all morning, my wife says I look like I just came home from a funeral. This is not bragging. This is an illness."
-Carl Hiaasen
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"Here's my rule: You always want to pay cash for your own books, because if they look at the name on the credit card and then they look at the name on the book jacket, then there's this look of such profound sympathy for you that you had to resort to this. It really is withering."
-Carl Hiaasen
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"Most of the basic material a writer works with is acquired before the age of fifteen."
-Willa Cather
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"Age is a very high price to pay for maturity."
-Tom Stoppard
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"To teach how to live without certainty and yet without being paralysed by hesitation is perhaps the chief thing that philosophy, in our age, can do for those who study it."
-Bertrand Russell
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"What Youth deemed crystal, Age finds out was dew."
-Robert Browning
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"Reading, after a certain age, diverts the mind too much from its creative pursuits. Any man who reads too much and uses his own brain too little falls into lazy habits of thinking."
-Albert Einstein
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"Our Age of Anxiety is, in great part, the result of trying to do today's job with yesterday's tools and yesterday's concepts."
-Marshall McLuhan
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