"I want a chainsaw very badly, because I think cutting down a tree would be unbelievably satisfying. I have asked for a chainsaw for my birthday, but I think I'll probably be given jewelry instead.“

-Susan Orlean

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Susan Orlean quote on Birthday: "I want a chainsaw very badly, because I think cutting down a tree would be unbelievably sa..." - Aesthetic Wallpaper & Wisdom

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"I have long been one of those tedious people who rails against the coronation of 'student-athletes.' I have heard the argument that big-time athletics bring in loads of money to universities. I don't believe the money goes anywhere other than back into the sports teams, but that's another story."

-Susan Orlean

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"I went to a football school, which meant that I went to a university that served up education and was simultaneously operating a sports franchise."

-Susan Orlean

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"Living in a rural setting exposes you to so many marvelous things - the natural world and the particular texture of small-town life, and the exhilarating experience of open space."

-Susan Orlean

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"The first thing I think about when I wake up most mornings is the fact that I'm tired. I have been tired for decades. I am tired in the morning and I am tired while becalmed in the slough of the afternoon, and I am tired in the evening, except right when I try to go to sleep."

-Susan Orlean

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"Parents, it seems, have an almost Olympian persistence when it comes to suggesting more secure and lucrative lines of work for their children who have the notion that writing is an actual profession. I say this from experience."

-Susan Orlean

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"My ace in the hole as a human being used to be my capacity for remembering birthdays. I worked at it. Whenever I made a new friend, I made a point of finding out his or her birthday early on, and I would record it in my Filofax calendar."

-Susan Orlean

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"Your children need your presence more than your presents."

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"Would ye both eat your cake and have your cake?"

-John Heywood

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"I think, at a child's birth, if a mother could ask a fairy godmother to endow it with the most useful gift, that gift should be curiosity."

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"A gift consists not in what is done or given, but in the intention of the giver or doer."

-Lucius Annaeus Seneca

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"The best way to remember your wife's birthday is to remember it once."

-E. Joseph Cossman

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