Erma Bombeck - About car - 97428

"Marriage has no guarantees. If that's what you're looking for, go live with a car battery.“

-Erma Bombeck

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Marriage has no guarantees. If that's what you're looking for, go live with a car battery.

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"Thanksgiving dinners take eighteen hours to prepare. They are consumed in twelve minutes. Half-times take twelve minutes. This is not coincidence."

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"There's nothing sadder in this world than to awake Christmas morning and not be a child."

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"Being a child at home alone in the summer is a high-risk occupation. If you call your mother at work thirteen times an hour, she can hurt you."

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"Most women put off entertaining until the kids are grown."

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"Once you get a spice in your home, you have it forever. Women never throw out spices. The Egyptians were buried with their spices. I know which one I'm taking with me when I go."

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"I've exercised with women so thin that buzzards followed them to their cars."

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"I wanted to end my life so bad and was in my car ready to go down that ramp into the water, and I did go part way, but I stopped. I went again and stopped. I then got out of the car and stood by the car a nervous wreck."

-Susan Smith

"If you don't drink, smoke, or drive a car, you're a tax evader."

-Thomas S. Foley

"He's computerized, but I won't let him come on cold. I created KITT. I understand the personality of the car."

-William Daniels

"I am an artist. The track is my canvas, and the car is my brush."

-Graham Hill

"The car business is a lot like football. In football, you have to win once a week. In the car business, you have to win every day."

-Tom Dempsey

"Since my induction into the Sports Hall of Fame, I have wanted to have my No. 3 Chevy on exhibit for sports fans to see. I hope others will enjoy the car as much as I have."

-Junior Johnson