"Happiness is a byproduct of function, purpose, and conflict those who seek happiness for itself seek victory without war."
-William S. Burroughs
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"Man is an artifact designed for space travel. He is not designed to remain in his present biologic state any more than a tadpole is designed to remain a tadpole."
-William S. Burroughs
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"There couldn't be a society of people who didn't dream. They'd be dead in two weeks."
-William S. Burroughs
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"After a shooting spree, they always want to take the guns away from the people who didn't do it. I sure as hell wouldn't want to live in a society where the only people allowed guns are the police and the military."
-William S. Burroughs
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"Like all pure creatures, cats are practical."
-William S. Burroughs
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"Admittedly, a homosexual can be conditioned to react sexually to a woman, or to an old boot for that matter. In fact, both homo - and heterosexual experimental subjects have been conditioned to react sexually to an old boot, and you can save a lot of money that way."
-William S. Burroughs
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"I had never felt so lonely and so sad in my entire life."
-Susan Smith
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"Our hope, and it's a sad hope, is that... well, I mean we need a tip. That's why we have such a big reward. We just hope that someone is holding her for her child and that we can, you know, get her back with a tip."
-Scott Peterson
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"It's really sad that the kids today can only relate to Beethoven via a rock version of his music."
-Walter Murphy
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"Sad and sweet and wise Here a child reposes Dust is on his eyes, Quietly he lies - Satan, strew Roses."
-Robert Williams Buchanan
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"Keep it simple, keep it sexy, keep it sad."
-Mitch Miller
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"It is a sad day for our country when the moral foundation of our law and the acknowledgment of God has to be hidden from public view to appease a federal judge."
-Soledad O'Brien
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