"All the men in my family were bearded, and most of the women."
-W. C. Fields
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"I never worry about being driven to drink I just worry about being driven home.“
-W. C. Fields
posted in valentinesday
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"Women are like elephants. I like to look at 'em, but I wouldn't want to own one."
-W. C. Fields
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"No doubt exists that all women are crazy it's only a question of degree."
-W. C. Fields
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"You can't trust water: Even a straight stick turns crooked in it."
-W. C. Fields
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"Reminds me of my safari in Africa. Somebody forgot the corkscrew and for several days we had to live on nothing but food and water."
-W. C. Fields
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"There comes a time in the affairs of man when he must take the bull by the tail and face the situation."
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"I like to go to parties where I know everyone. How are you going to have fun with people you don't know?"
-Mary-Kate Olsen
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"Strange to see how a good dinner and feasting reconciles everybody."
-Samuel Pepys
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"My parents used to throw great New Year's Eve parties. They invited such an eclectic mix of showbiz people. All those cool people were always hanging out at our apartment."
-Ben Stiller
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"Accept what people offer. Drink their milkshakes. Take their love."
-Wally Lamb
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"Going to a party, for me, is as much a learning experience as, you know, sitting in a lecture."
-Natalie Portman
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"I've had some lovely extraordinary experiences on New Year's Eve."
-Debbie Harry
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