"Once again, we come to the Holiday Season, a deeply religious time that each of us observes, in his own way, by going to the mall of his choice.“

-Dave Barry

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Dave Barry quote about Time: "Once again, we come to the Holiday Season, a deeply religious time that each of us observes, in his ..."

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"Geographically, Ireland is a medium-sized rural island that is slowly but steadily being consumed by sheep."

-Dave Barry

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"Once again, we come to the Holiday Season, a deeply religious time that each of us observes, in his own way, by going to the mall of his choice."

-Dave Barry

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"Guys are simple... women are not simple and they always assume that men must be just as complicated as they are, only way more mysterious. The whole point is guys are not thinking much. They are just what they appear to be. Tragically."

-Dave Barry

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"I have been a gigantic Rolling Stones fan since approximately the Spanish-American War."

-Dave Barry

"The simple truth is that balding African-American men look cool when they shave their heads, whereas balding white men look like giant thumbs."

-Dave Barry

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"The only kind of seafood I trust is the fish stick, a totally featureless fish that doesn't have eyeballs or fins."

-Dave Barry

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-Henry A. Kissinger

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"It's plain hokum. If you can't convince 'em, confuse 'em. It's an old political trick. But this time it won't work."

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"A lot of people would be embarrassed to admit that they were on 'Barney', but I embrace the fact. I just had such a wonderful time doing that show. I learned what a camera and prop is, and all that. I learned my manners too, so I guess that's a good thing!"

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