"It's so warm now, and Thanksgiving came so early - is it just me, or does it not really feel like Ramadan?"
-David Letterman
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"Don't forget it's daylight savings time. You spring forward, then you fall back. It's like Robert Downey Jr. getting out of bed.“
-David Letterman
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Other Quotes by David Letterman
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"The White House is giving George W. Bush intelligence briefings. You know, some of these jokes just write themselves."
-David Letterman
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"Dick Cheney said he was running again. He said his health was fine, 'I've got a doctor with me 24 hours a day.' Yeah, that's always the sign of a man in good health, isn't it?"
-David Letterman
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"We inadvertently bombed the Chinese Embassy. But Clinton now is working very hard. He has sent a letter of apology to the Chinese. And, he's also given them a gift certificate for future nuclear secrets."
-David Letterman
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"I cannot sing, dance or act what else would I be but a talk show host."
-David Letterman
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"There's only one requirement of any of us, and that is to be courageous. Because courage, as you might know, defines all other human behavior. And, I believe - because I've done a little of this myself - pretending to be courageous is just as good as the real thing."
-David Letterman
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"To be a Negro in this country and to be relatively conscious is to be in a rage almost all the time."
-James A. Baldwin
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"No country can act wisely simultaneously in every part of the globe at every moment of time."
-Henry A. Kissinger
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"It's time to get real, folks. Hope and change ain't working. Hope and change is not a solution. Hope and change is not a job."
-Herman Cain
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"It's plain hokum. If you can't convince 'em, confuse 'em. It's an old political trick. But this time it won't work."
-Harry S. Truman
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"Nixon is one of the few in the history of this country to run for high office talking out of both sides of his mouth at the same time and lying out of both sides."
-Harry S. Truman
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"A lot of people would be embarrassed to admit that they were on 'Barney', but I embrace the fact. I just had such a wonderful time doing that show. I learned what a camera and prop is, and all that. I learned my manners too, so I guess that's a good thing!"
-Selena Gomez
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