"Do you know what it means to come home at night to a woman who'll give you a little love, a little affection, a little tenderness? It means you're in the wrong house, that's what it means."
-Henny Youngman
MarriageView Quote
"If you're going to do something tonight that you'll be sorry for tomorrow morning, sleep late.“
-Henny Youngman
posted in Funny
Other Quotes by Henny Youngman
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"My dad was the town drunk. Most of the time that's not so bad but New York City?"
-Henny Youngman
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"The secret of a happy marriage remains a secret."
-Henny Youngman
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"I once wanted to become an atheist, but I gave up - they have no holidays."
-Henny Youngman
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"A self-taught man usually has a poor teacher and a worse student."
-Henny Youngman
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"This man used to go to school with his dog. Then they were separated. His dog graduated!"
-Henny Youngman
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"People say that life is the thing, but I prefer reading."
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"My one regret in life is that I am not someone else."
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"My grandmother started walking five miles a day when she was sixty. She's ninety-seven now, and we don't know where the hell she is."
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