"There's also a certain rhythm to the way Jews talk that might be funny.“

-Larry David

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Larry David quote on Funny: "There's also a certain rhythm to the way Jews talk that might be funny." - Aesthetic Wallpaper & Wisdom

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"I couldn't be happier that President Bush has stood up for having served in the National Guard, because I can finally put an end to all those who questioned my motives for enlisting in the Army Reserve at the height of the Vietnam War."

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"When you're not concerned with succeeding, you can work with complete freedom."

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"Women love a self-confident bald man."

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"The best situation is being a single parent. The best part about is that you get time off, too, because the kids are with their mom, so it's the best of both worlds. There's a lot to be said for it."

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"If you tell the truth about how you're feeling, it becomes funny."

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"I gave a funny speech at my wife's birthday party, and I'm thinking, 'Hey, I've still got it.'"

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"People say that life is the thing, but I prefer reading."

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"My one regret in life is that I am not someone else."

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"My grandmother started walking five miles a day when she was sixty. She's ninety-seven now, and we don't know where the hell she is."

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