"I'm Jewish. I don't work out. If God had wanted us to bend over, He would have put diamonds on the floor."
-Joan Rivers
workView Quote
"Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, today is God's gift, that's why we call it the present.“
-Joan Rivers
posted in god
Other Quotes
Discover more inspiring quotes from our collection
"What are people going to do? Fire me? I've been fired before. Not book me? I've been out of work before. I don't care."
-Joan Rivers
workView Quote
"Don't follow any advice, no matter how good, until you feel as deeply in your spirit as you think in your mind that the counsel is wise."
-Joan Rivers
wisdomView Quote
"She doesn't understand the concept of Roman numerals. She thought we just fought in world war eleven."
-Joan Rivers
warView Quote
"The first time I see a jogger smiling, I'll consider it."
-Joan Rivers
timeView Quote
"Thank God we're living in a country where the sky's the limit, the stores are open late and you can shop in bed thanks to television."
-Joan Rivers
thankfulView Quote
Same Category
More quotes in this category
"Discernment is God's call to intercession, never to faultfinding."
-Corrie Ten Boom
godView Quote
"I really am pretty happy with what God gave me."
-Jennifer Aniston
godView Quote
"Man's sin is in his failure to live what he is. Being the master of the earth, man forgets that he is the servant of God."
-Abraham Joshua Heschel
godView Quote
"I've looked on many women with lust. I've committed adultery in my heart many times. God knows I will do this and forgives me."
-Jimmy Carter
godView Quote
"The face you have at age 25 is the face God gave you, but the face you have after 50 is the face you earned."
-Cindy Crawford
godView Quote
"We have domesticated God's transcendence. We often learn about God at about the same time as we are learning about Santa Claus but our ideas about Santa Claus change, mature and become more nuanced, whereas our ideas of God can remain at a rather infantile level."
-Karen Armstrong
godView Quote