"I put instant coffee in a microwave oven and almost went back in time."
-Steven Wright
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"I have an answering machine in my car. It says, I'm home now. But leave a message and I'll call when I'm out.“
-Steven Wright
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Other Quotes by Steven Wright
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"I went to a restaurant that serves 'breakfast at any time'. So I ordered French Toast during the Renaissance."
-Steven Wright
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"What's another word for Thesaurus?"
-Steven Wright
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"I'm writing a book. I've got the page numbers done."
-Steven Wright
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"A lot of people are afraid of heights. Not me, I'm afraid of widths."
-Steven Wright
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"Everywhere is within walking distance if you have the time."
-Steven Wright
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Same Category
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"A man travels the world over in search of what he needs and returns home to find it."
-George A. Moore
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"Every strike brings me closer to the next home run."
-Babe Ruth
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"Home is the place where, when you have to go there, they have to take you in."
-Robert Frost
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"The home is the chief school of human virtues."
-William Ellery Channing
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"We cannot defend freedom abroad by deserting it at home."
-Edward R. Murrow
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"My home is in Heaven. I'm just traveling through this world."
-Billy Graham
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