"Fettucini alfredo is macaroni and cheese for adults."
-Mitch Hedberg
FoodView Quote
"I recently took up ice sculpting. Last night I made an ice cube. This morning I made 12, I was prolific.“
-Mitch Hedberg
posted in Morning
Other Quotes by Mitch Hedberg
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"I'm sick of following my dreams. I'm just going to ask them where they're goin', and hook up with them later."
-Mitch Hedberg
DreamsView Quote
"Is a hippopotamus a hippopotamus, or just a really cool Opotamus?"
-Mitch Hedberg
CoolView Quote
"I was at this casino minding my own business, and this guy came up to me and said, 'You're gonna have to move, you're blocking a fire exit.' As though if there was a fire, I wasn't gonna run. If you're flammible and have legs, you are never blocking a fire exit."
-Mitch Hedberg
BusinessView Quote
"I had a stick of CareFree gum, but it didn't work. I felt pretty good while I was blowing that bubble, but as soon as the gum lost its flavor, I was back to pondering my mortality."
-Mitch Hedberg
WorkView Quote
"I'm a heroine addict. I need to have sex with women who have saved someone's life."
-Mitch Hedberg
WomenView Quote
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"The problem with marriage is that it ends every night after making love, and it must be rebuilt every morning before breakfast."
-Gabriel Garcia Marquez
MorningView Quote
"When you arise in the morning, think of what a precious privilege it is to be alive - to breathe, to think, to enjoy, to love."
-Marcus Aurelius
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"Love. Fall in love and stay in love. Write only what you love, and love what you write. The key word is love. You have to get up in the morning and write something you love, something to live for."
-Ray Bradbury
MorningView Quote
"One morning I shot an elephant in my pajamas. How he got into my pajamas I'll never know."
-Groucho Marx
MorningView Quote
"The one ironclad rule is that I have to try. I have to walk into my writing room and pick up my pen every weekday morning."
-Anne Tyler
MorningView Quote
"Every morning I jump out of bed and step on a landmine. The landmine is me. After the explosion, I spent the rest of the day putting the pieces together."
-Ray Bradbury
MorningView Quote