"For three days after death, hair and fingernails continue to grow but phone calls taper off."
-Johnny Carson
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"Mail your packages early so the post office can lose them in time for Christmas.“
-Johnny Carson
posted in Christmas
Other Quotes by Johnny Carson
Discover more inspiring quotes by Johnny Carson
"I know a man who gave up smoking, drinking, sex, and rich food. He was healthy right up to the day he killed himself."
-Johnny Carson
FoodView Quote
"My success just evolved from working hard at the business at hand each day."
-Johnny Carson
SuccessView Quote
"Never continue in a job you don't enjoy. If you're happy in what you're doing, you'll like yourself, you'll have inner peace. And if you have that, along with physical health, you will have had more success than you could possibly have imagined."
-Johnny Carson
SuccessView Quote
"For days after death hair and fingernails continue to grow, but phone calls taper off."
-Johnny Carson
DeathView Quote
"Happiness is your dentist telling you it won't hurt and then having him catch his hand in the drill."
-Johnny Carson
HappinessView Quote
Same Category
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"Christmas, children, is not a date. It is a state of mind."
-Mary Ellen Chase
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"The Supreme Court has ruled that they cannot have a nativity scene in Washington, D.C. This wasn't for any religious reasons. They couldn't find three wise men and a virgin."
-Jay Leno
ChristmasView Quote
"I stopped believing in Santa Claus when I was six. Mother took me to see him in a department store and he asked for my autograph."
-Shirley Temple
ChristmasView Quote
"The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live."
-George Carlin
ChristmasView Quote
"The excellence of a gift lies in its appropriateness rather than in its value."
-Charles Dudley Warner
ChristmasView Quote
"I love Christmas. Frosty the Snowman, peace on Earth and mangers, Salvation Army bell ringers and reindeer, the movie 'Meet Me in St. Louis,' office parties and cookies."
-Mo Rocca
ChristmasView Quote