"I don't want to achieve immortality through my work. I want to achieve it through not dying."
-Woody Allen
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"I took a speed-reading course and read War and Peace in twenty minutes. It involves Russia."
-Woody Allen
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"Time is nature's way of keeping everything from happening at once."
-Woody Allen
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"Most of the time I don't have much fun. The rest of the time I don't have any fun at all."
-Woody Allen
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"I am thankful for laughter, except when milk comes out of my nose."
-Woody Allen
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"I had a terrible education. I attended a school for emotionally disturbed teachers."
-Woody Allen
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"There's no regret. You can't regret. I mean, I've felt regret but I've also refused to allow regret to sow a seed and live in me because I don't believe it. You feel it, it's like guilt, it's like jealousy, it's like all those horrible things. You've just got to snip them and get them out, because they're no good."
-Jude Law
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"God is everywhere but He is most manifest in man. So serve man as God. That is as good as worshipping God."
-Ramakrishna
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"My mother gave lots of good advice and had a lot to say. As you get older, you realize everything she said was true."
-Lenny Kravitz
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"Bear and endure: This sorrow will one day prove to be for your good."
-Ovid
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"Let's not be afraid to speak the common sense truth: you can't have high standards without good discipline."
-William Hague
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"It's a good thing that beauty is only skin deep, or I'd be rotten to the core."
-Phyllis Diller
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