"I find television very educating. Every time somebody turns on the set, I go into the other room and read a book."
-Groucho Marx
TimeView Quote
"A child of five would understand this. Send someone to fetch a child of five.“
-Groucho Marx
posted in Funny
Other Quotes by Groucho Marx
Discover more inspiring quotes by Groucho Marx
"The secret of life is honesty and fair dealing. If you can fake that, you've got it made."
-Groucho Marx
LifeView Quote
"Humor is reason gone mad."
-Groucho Marx
HumorView Quote
"One morning I shot an elephant in my pajamas. How he got into my pajamas I'll never know."
-Groucho Marx
MorningView Quote
"Well, Art is Art, isn't it? Still, on the other hand, water is water. And east is east and west is west and if you take cranberries and stew them like applesauce they taste much more like prunes than rhubarb does. Now you tell me what you know."
-Groucho Marx
ArtView Quote
"I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury."
-Groucho Marx
WeddingView Quote
Same Category
More quotes in this category
"A day without sunshine is like, you know, night."
-Steve Martin
FunnyView Quote
"When you are courting a nice girl an hour seems like a second. When you sit on a red-hot cinder a second seems like an hour. That's relativity."
-Albert Einstein
FunnyView Quote
"People say that life is the thing, but I prefer reading."
-Logan P. Smith
FunnyView Quote
"My one regret in life is that I am not someone else."
-Woody Allen
FunnyView Quote
"To succeed in life, you need three things: a wishbone, a backbone and a funny bone."
-Reba McEntire
FunnyView Quote
"My grandmother started walking five miles a day when she was sixty. She's ninety-seven now, and we don't know where the hell she is."
-Ellen DeGeneres
FunnyView Quote