"A dog teaches a boy fidelity, perseverance, and to turn around three times before lying down."
-Robert Benchley
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"Dachshunds are ideal dogs for small children, as they are already stretched and pulled to such a length that the child cannot do much harm one way or the other.“
-Robert Benchley
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"In America there are two classes of travel - first class, and with children."
-Robert Benchley
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"I have tried to know absolutely nothing about a great many things, and I have succeeded fairly well."
-Robert Benchley
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"It took me fifteen years to discover I had no talent for writing, but I couldn't give it up because by that time I was too famous."
-Robert Benchley
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"There seems to be no lengths to which humorless people will not go to analyze humor. It seems to worry them."
-Robert Benchley
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"A real hangover is nothing to try out family remedies on. The only cure for a real hangover is death."
-Robert Benchley
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"Until one has loved an animal a part of one's soul remains unawakened."
-Anatole France
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"Animals are reliable, many full of love, true in their affections, predictable in their actions, grateful and loyal. Difficult standards for people to live up to."
-Alfred A. Montapert
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"There are two means of refuge from the miseries of life: music and cats."
-Albert Schweitzer
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"Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole."
-Roger Caras
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"Cats are intended to teach us that not everything in nature has a function."
-Garrison Keillor
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"The average dog is a nicer person than the average person."
-Andy Rooney
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