"I never in my wildest imagination dreamed that I would somehow become a sports commentator."
-Joe Rogan
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"That's my only goal. Surround myself with funny people, and make sure everyone has a good time and works hard.“
-Joe Rogan
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"Your body's really only meant to compete at the highest levels of combat sports for a few years."
-Joe Rogan
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"I had seen movies before that that had made me laugh, but I had never seen anything even remotely close to as funny as Richard Pryor was, just standing there talking."
-Joe Rogan
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"Never stay in a bad marriage, and don't hang around with psycho coke fiends."
-Joe Rogan
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"I never in my wildest imagination dreamed that I would somehow become a sports commentator."
-Joe Rogan
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"The misconception is that standup comics are always on. I don't know any really funny comics that are annoying and constantly trying to be funny all the time."
-Joe Rogan
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"To be a Negro in this country and to be relatively conscious is to be in a rage almost all the time."
-James A. Baldwin
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"No country can act wisely simultaneously in every part of the globe at every moment of time."
-Henry A. Kissinger
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"It's time to get real, folks. Hope and change ain't working. Hope and change is not a solution. Hope and change is not a job."
-Herman Cain
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"It's plain hokum. If you can't convince 'em, confuse 'em. It's an old political trick. But this time it won't work."
-Harry S. Truman
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"Nixon is one of the few in the history of this country to run for high office talking out of both sides of his mouth at the same time and lying out of both sides."
-Harry S. Truman
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"A lot of people would be embarrassed to admit that they were on 'Barney', but I embrace the fact. I just had such a wonderful time doing that show. I learned what a camera and prop is, and all that. I learned my manners too, so I guess that's a good thing!"
-Selena Gomez
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